45 ) - A simple but lovely true love story of mine.
This is a very sweet and touching story of mine. It gives me a lovely and touched recap whenever I was bored. I know him when I was 16. He is the guy who had changed my entire life. I do have other relationships before, but he is different. I met him life have become different for me.
After chatting for some time, we decided to meet up at the shopping centre nearby my home, Chua Chu Kang Lot 1
He is wearing a red tee, a white coat, black pants and black shiny leather shoes. My first impression was he is ugly, old but charming. He had impressed me by his manly look, and then we went up to the arcade to meet my friend, Eileen. Both of them were not really at good term with each other at first as Eileen thinks that he is quite rude, and wanted to go off first, leaving us alone. He placed his order and we made our way to the smoking benches outside the restaurant
He then showed me a photo taken with his ex-girlfriend, a Taiwan girl, named Carrie. He looked cool in the photo. I was admired by his maturity. He smokes Marlboro Red, with his gold color Zippo lighter, I love that lighter a lot and thought that he was a coolest smoker I ever seen.
Around 6pm in the evening, we decided to leave as I think it is time for me to go home. He sends me home taking TIBS Bus service 989. We sat at the last row of the bus. This is where our beautiful romance begins.
Due to the strong air condition, he took off his coat and gave it to me. He then looked into my eyes and holds my hands, asking me to be his girlfriend. Butterflies were flying in my stomach.
When he realised that I didn’t give him any reply, and he declared, “I give a count of 5, and if you didn’t answer, I’ll take it that you have agreed."
5... 4... 3... 2... 1... Ok! For this moment you will be mine, Mi Nan’s girl friend, I will always take good care of you.” This is how our happiness started on Saturday, 1st September, 2001, evening time.
People commented that our relationship would not last as this is like any IRC meeting or a short term BGR so I didn’t demand anything from this relationship maybe because I was too young to commit myself.
Well, I didn’t know that this guy will be the guy whom I really like and want to be with. But before I know it, I have already given my whole heart to him when I saw all that he has done for me.
I admit that I’m not a good girl friend as I didn’t spare any thoughts for him. I always picking up small quarrels and expected him to love me more every time. He always believes that this relationship will continue to have sparks, and will hold on to it with whatever he have to support, and I always take for him granted and demand more from him.
I always believe that he will be there for me whenever I need him.
What I know is whatever he was doing at that time is always for me, his education, his perception of life and everything. I was in his first priority in life.
He grooms me with his fashion senses and buys clothes for me. I begin to dress maturely even at the age of 16. He brought me to the life of luxuries with delicious food and pampered me well. He didn’t go for looks at all. He gave me whatever he could afford. However, my dream shattered away when he decided to left.
We had gone through thick and thin, promised to love each other no matter what had affected our lives. Many people envied me for having a good boyfriend who love, care and accompanied whenever I need him. I am not a good girlfriend; I always make him angry and picked up fights.
Once, I vent my anger on him and suggested a break-off, he came down from Hougang in the middle of the night to console and hugged me, despite the criticism I said. I'm very touched, laugh and cried that the same time. My tongue was twisted when I saw him. I really love him a lot but I like to make him angry too. I am really childish at that time, knowing nothing even my Mr. Right is standing in front of me
He was the most understanding guy I've ever meet. He always tried to make me happy with all his funny acts, like making monkey’s faces, act “cool” and even buy good food for me. He didn’t mind my weakness and loves me even deeper when he shower me with his love
A popular Korean show “Sassy girl” had reflects a lot about our relationship. I've always hate myself for being the way the actress acts on how she bully her boyfriend whom characteristic is timid, caring and funny. He gave me his very best and treasures me by giving me his everything included his heart but I always neglected his feeling. I always thought that Nan will always be there whenever I need him.
Dreams were shattered when he left. I was in a total lost at that time. A guy who I depend a lot and loved most was about to leave me. I was just like a withered flower and I hate myself for being such a useless girlfriend that I could not do anything but to let the guy I love most to leave me.
Nightmare begins to start. When I start to scold and picked up quarrel with him, he gave no reaction, unlike the past when he used to treat me so good. These hurting words began to come up from his mouth, however I didn’t blame him. I just hope that he will still stay by my side. I know that whatever he did now to hurt me wasn’t going to stop me from loving him just as much.
He did promise me not to leave me but promises are meant to be broken. We then ended our relationship at 21’june’2002, an affectionate 9 months relationship.
I didn’t blame him at all, because he had done his very best to love and care for me during that period of time. I should have thanked him for being a good companion to me.
Now, he is currently living in Shang Hai to complete his studies and had a good relationship with his girlfriend, while I am still studying in my polytechnic here having no love life. I wonder if Nan didn’t leave me, will we still be together. Will we love each other like before?
There is always much possible answer for me to consider and answer, but what I know is that he is the guy who loves me the most and a guy whom I love the most. I know that even if there are chances for us to meet, I won’t want any patch back as I know he won’t want it too.
These are all the sweet childhood memories for us to think of whenever we like to recall or feel bored. Isn’t it sweet to have such lovely memories? Past is past, let bygones be bygones.
I do missed this guy and hope that he's got a good relationship with the girl he loved and have a bright future in his studies and work. I miss you Nan because you have left such a deep impression in my heart
Well, I am here to fulfill the agreement u promised me, because u did say that you are going to write out our story. So, here is our story for you. Those memories you left in my life were really good. Thank you. : )
 Sunday, June 06, 2004 at 03:04 |
44 ) - The Cell
THE CELL
It is probably fair to say that having an enemy is the the worst fear a man can encounter. All men fear something. To face the very enemy that wishes to harm you will conjure feelings like you have never felt before, a cataclysm of sensual feeling, stirred with the most horrific of sicknesses.
Staring death in the face for long enough allows the mind to bend thoughts so magnificently that the reality becomes just a dream, pain a meaningless word, and death a welcoming thought. Let me take you to the world where those who have committed the incest are readily punished for their crimes on mankind, for producing creatures that disgust our world, the creatures that are no better treated than lepers and no more remembered than the past that has never been.
Shut your eyes, blank your mind and think of nothing but the four walls of the 20ft cell you are imprisoned within. You are now about to view and watch the horror unfold.
Look to your right, you can see the damp wall seething blood through its cracks..the wall is alive and groans under the weight of misery.......As you look around the room your feelings of distaste increase,
The room is breathing and a cold rush of air bites your neck.
With the little light given from the dull flame in the corner, it takes time for your eyes to adjust. In the centre of the room four beings back to back are chained together. Their legs are pinned to the ground and hands shackled behind their backs. Already they have undergone a preliminary hearing, found guilty of their crimes and sentenced to an immediate punishment.
The prisoners have no obvious facial features, their eyes have been melted closed, their tongues have been removed..but still their senses remain in tact so their pain is maximised..the prisoners are awake, unable to talk, and unaware of their fate to come...
Let me take you now in to the mind of one of the victims...a man who has committed a torrid reign of unacceptable crimes upon his own family, someone who has butchered and defaced his own without ever committing an act of violence, his crime is his passion for sadistic abuse. His daughters, who are now the bearers and up bringers of vulgar beings, so horrible they have been disowned to a life of horrific abuse and neglect.
You are now in the body of the accused.... fusssssed.... your brain is his mind and his feelings are yours.... locked in to endure the torture. You can see nothing, but begin to feel the ´light dripping of water upon your head, it is un-troubling at first, but is now pounding, pounding, it is beginning to echo through you mind like a hammer rhythmically striking your skull, bang, bang...your head is hurting your thoughts are an array of stars. The pain is intensifying with the crashing of the water... relentlessly, relentlessly........Your skull is cracking, your mind is screeching for relief...you try to tilt you head but it is firmly clamped, you scream but your lips are sewn and your tongue is gone.......
Some hours later.....
Your ears can make out the door of the cell opening and several beings enter the room. You are now being circled, like condors gliding on a mountain range..your mind is now focused and your ears are bleeding to hear your fate.......The enemy is here and your sentence about to begin.
Fear fills the room, your fellow prisoners are struggling to understand, knowing there is no escape, nerves jolt bodies, muffled screams produce sickening visions in your mind which twist thoughts so revolting your stomach stir's, vomit is brought to your mouth, then forced back down with no where to go. You are choking, but cannot cough, you are constantly sick, coughing, choking, drowning in your bowls...your head is hammering, your ears are bleeding , the pain is no longer pain and the fear is just a feeling of normality..but the fear of death still looms..not death itself for now nothing is better than the thought of peace, but the fear of how your life is to be finalized.
Blades are sheathed, and a hand begins stroking your toes, caressing them with the finest touch, it is almost nice. The hand moves delicately up your leg, smothely stroking, gently caressing..... a nice sensation......The hand is quickly removed and replaced with the cold sharp edge of a tool, you think it is a butchers knife or an axe. This is now gently stoking the inside of your leg....crimes of incest are flashing through your mind...the day you punished your beautiful daughter, so tender, so young, so innocent..and the day she produced that monster..to think of the pain it must of felt growing up, locked in the cell, tortured from birth, for no reason but for been born. Blindfolded, gagged, bound, fed once per week, and whipped daily..that monstrous creature which i tortured so inhumanely...and now it is he who..fk..its him that is now bearing the blade, caressing my leg..oh fk its him.. punishing me....and...my.... prison colleagues, i wonder who they are..uncle sam, sister Ellen..ohhhhhfkkking helllll...may god forgive me for my horrible crimes and give me mercy...
You are now paralysed with fear, sweating, pulsating, excreting and crying, crying with no tears, screaming with no tongue...every orifice is sewn together bar your nose and ears.....your head is spinning out thoughts of distant memories..the good old days..childhood...the days of school, your first job, marriage......aghhhhh
You feel the blade stroke firmly across your left ankle marking an incision...then you hear if flute downwards..crack..now your right ankle is marked then swiftly removed...your left leg above your knee is marked..then removed...right leg above your knee..marked then removed........i feel sick...oh so sick.... The blade slowly moves to your stomach and is gently sliding away till you feel your sickness spout like a river of evil............ your bowels slither out, the length of a python wrapping themselves around your body, up to your neck, slithering, hsssss...they are asking you why???why?? Gripping tighter around your neck strangling and crushing your bones, but you can feel, smell and hear the hssssss. the snake is here, around you, looking and inspecting the alien world its entered.........
It is almost over..
And now it is time to come out of the victim...back to the cell..you can see the man laying trying to wriggle, his body a mess.....you are now transported back to your desk..
Saturday, June 05, 2004 at 13:50 |
43 ) - rwq
 "http://www.nirvana-shop.com/ref.php?id=540a3824f87d0a"
http://www.nirvana-shop.com/ref.php?id=540a3824f87d0a
Monday, May 31, 2004 at 06:28 |
41 ) - One Month Away from Homelessness
My name is Georgeann Carter and I am a 46 year old woman, single parent mother of 19 year old twins boy/girl. I have always worked to support my children and myself after the desertion of their father in 1990 when they were five years old. I had a lot of support from my parents that helped us stay afloat when times got financially diffucult.
In 1999, my mother died of complications from kidney failure and my children and myself had to move in with my dad and take care of him with assistance until her died on July 26, 2003, of lung, liver and brain cancer. My children provided the majority of his care because
I became disabled and had to quite my job as a daycare administrator.
Both of my parents died and only have burial insurance with nothing left but a home with a home equity loan balance of $58,000. I am the executor of the will but can't afford to pay an attorney $3000 to go through the probate process for my dad's house he willed to me. My daughter is finishing up her first year in college and my son is looking for work to help out. My monthly expenses are $1100 a month and my income is $609. The house is handicap assessable and I do not want to lose this house or for my family to become homeless.
Anything anyone can do will be greatly appreciated. I also welcome any advise anyone can offer. I hope my story is understandable and I can provide verification on everything I mentioned. I'm registered at paypal.com and my email address is Georgie628@aol.com. Thank you!
Georgeann
Friday, May 21, 2004 at 22:03 |
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